What is what to do when a narcissist calls you a narcissist?

Here's what to do when a narcissist accuses you of being a narcissist:

When a narcissist accuses you of being a narcissist, it's usually a form of psychological projection and deflection. Here's a breakdown of what's happening and how to respond:

• Understanding the Tactic: It's highly likely they're employing a defense mechanism. They are attributing their own narcissistic traits and behaviors onto you to avoid facing them in themselves. This is a classic example of projection.

• Don't React Defensively: Arguing or getting defensive usually fuels their need for attention and control. They want to provoke a reaction. Responding calmly or not reacting at all is often the most effective approach.

• Avoid Engaging: Refrain from trying to convince them that they are wrong or that you are not a narcissist. This is a trap. They will likely twist your words and use them against you. Trying to reason with a narcissist is usually futile. Consider using gray%20rock method.

• Reflect (Internally): While you shouldn't outwardly react, it's wise to internally reflect. Are there any behaviors they are referencing that could be construed as selfish or inconsiderate (even if unintentional)? If so, acknowledging them to yourself allows for personal growth. However, this introspection is for your benefit, not for the narcissist's consumption.

• Set Boundaries: If the accusation is part of a larger pattern of abuse, it's essential to set firm boundaries. This might involve limiting contact, ending the conversation, or removing yourself from the situation entirely. Learn about how to set healthy boundaries.

• Focus on Your Wellbeing: Dealing with a narcissist can be emotionally draining. Prioritize self-care, seek support from trusted friends or family, or consider therapy to help you cope with the situation and develop healthy coping mechanisms. It might be beneficial to learn more about self-care.

• Recognize Gaslighting: Being constantly accused of something you're not is a form of gaslighting. This is a manipulation tactic to make you doubt your sanity and perception of reality. Be aware of this.